Gifts with a double edged sword...

As I was waiting at the window of McD's tonight (I was there for my $1 sweet tea fix....geee) I couldn't help but notice the display of "Arch Cards" that people can purchase for their loved ones in case they are in the McD's drive up window and suddenly remember "Oh shit, I forgot it was our anniversary surely the love of my life would love a ticket to a fatter ass and big old hamhock thighs, on second thought, I had better get her two". Just who the hell would love opening up a card on any holiday and seeing a McD's gift card? KIDS, small french fry eating, nugget inhaling, happy meal toy collecting kids. Thats who. But don't you think buying them gift cards to the artery clogging hall of fame is kind of like handing them loaded weapons and saying "oh just point and shoot" without saying "but make sure ya ain't shootin' at people". Kids aren't going to walk into McD's and say "Hey with this here gift card I sure would like me some yogurt and apple dippers with a side salad" HELL NO...they are gonna walk in loud and proud and say "SUPERSIZE IT".

I won't lie, I do hit McD's on occasion but I can't even imagine getting my kids a gift card there. Hell I can't imagine getting anyone a gift card there. I know if someone got me a gift card to McD's I would have to question their motives..."Hey, are ya calling me fat?" or "WTF dude, can't you do better than this?" Another place that has gift cards is the Holiday store and the Tesoro stores. Yep, convenience stores...nothing says "thinking of you babe" than picking up a gift card for the convenience store. Sure the white trash crowd who goes there daily for a pack of smokes, a half rack of Hamms and slurpee's for the younguns' probably think this is the height of romantic gifts, this and perhaps a new nudie mag and a 40. Who knows...all I know is that if someone got me one I would be slightly insulted.

So note to all who may be swayed by the colorful plastic arch cards....RESIST! You can do better. If you don't have time to buy a gift cash is ALWAYS a good option. Step away from places like convenience stores and fast food places. It doesn't say "love" it says "I am a cheap ass lameass who couldn't be bothered to think this gift giving thing through"